From the day you are born, especially if you are a girl, everyone around you starts planning for your marriage. You are made to believe that no matter how independent or literate you become, your ultimate goal is to settle down in your life with a man. Once you cross the marriageable threshold of 18, all the auntis, chachis and mamis start exercising their matchmaking rights.
Under such circumstances, it's difficult not to bow down under the family pressure. But before doing so, read our five top reasons why you shouldn't get married!
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Growing up, listening to fairytales like Cinderella and Beauty & the Beast, girls come to expect that marriage will solve all of their problems, their spouse will happily fulfil all their needs and they would live happily ever after. So, when it comes to reality and their marriage doesn’t meet their expectations, all hell breaks loose. The girl starts blaming the marriage, spouse and parents when she herself is at fault. Having an inflated idea of happiness in marriage will never let you enjoy the small joys of life. If you still believe in fairytales, happily ever after and prince charming, then it’s better to wait before you come out of your fantasy world.
As a married woman, meeting new people, socialising and going out for an impromptu vacation would be difficult. After marriage, your family comes first, but, when you are single, you come first. You can spend as much time as you want with your friends unless it doesn’t impinge on the time you are supposed to spend with your husband or your family. If you find it difficult to include your spouse among your group of friends, or cannot alter your usual evening plans to go out with your spouse even once, then it will be really difficult to manage your marriage. Even as a married woman, you are entitled to your own privacy and social life, but when you are not ready to reschedule or work as a team, it’s difficult for a relationship to survive.
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True, there’s always the option of taking a divorce, when you want to walk off a marriage. Sounds easy, but it’s not. Two families are involved in this. You alone cannot make the decision to separate, hurting everyone's feelings. Things get even more complicated if children are involved. So, if you think you can just pick a guy, get married and then again leave him if the marriage didn’t work, you may want to rethink your decision. There’s no harm in staying single or being in a relationship. Take the next big step of marriage only if you are sure about it.
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For the first time you met this guy, there was an instant connection. It’s difficult to stay apart and he is the only one who understands you so well. During the initial stage of attraction, you might not be able to think clearly, high on chemicals, you might even think of getting married. Before taking such an important decision, give your relationship a test of time. Let the puppy stage of love settle down. Once you come out of that haze, things become clearer and you would be in a better position to see if it is the right time to get married yet or not.
If you aren’t getting married for yourself, then you shouldn’t get married. It’s as simple as that. It’s easy to feel pressured when everyone around you wants you to get married, but if you don’t want to, you absolutely don’t need to get married. Stand your ground if you think this is not the right time for you to tie the knot. Don’t let your relatives pressurise you into going down the aisle.
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Love and teamwork is the foundation of all happy marriages. When you feel unloved, it’s time to sit back and decide whether you really want to get married at this time. So what are your reasons for not getting married? Do let us know in the comments below.
