Question: I do not get along with my fiancée’s friends and this is always a cause for fights between us. We have been engaged for over three months now and have been going out almost every weekend. I do not enjoy outings with his friends because all they do is drink and act immature. Although my fiancée does not act like that on a normal basis he is completely different with his friends and I feel embarrassed. What should I do?
Answer: This is one of the main challenges that most engaged couples or newlyweds face –dealing with each other’s friends. The responsibility of dealing with friends who act so immature and irresponsible lies with your fiancée. He needs to figure if such friendships are a good choice for your relationship. In fact this is a good opportunity for both of you to learn to be flexible and compromise on issues you don’t agree over. Also what you can do is whenever you hang out with friends of your fiancée with him around, try to speak with people you are comfortable and leave when you think you have had enough. Tell your fiancée that you are leaving because you are not comfortable anymore. Speak to him about his friends when it is just the both of you and tell him why you feel uncomfortable. Keep your communication lines open so you are in sync with each other’s emotions, feelings and personal problems. This enables you to deal with the biggest problems by just speaking about it and deciding what is right and wrong for your relationship. You might be pleasantly surprise to find yourself being your fiancée’s best friend in the months to come. All you need is patience and the ability to communicate your feelings.