Question
I will be married soon and have heard enough about issues with in-laws from my family and friends. Since I only have to deal with three sisters in law, I want to know how I can start off right so there is no room for feelings of insecurity or disagreement over anything in the future. Please let me know.
Answer
There are four areas you need to strive for harmony at before you get married – money, religious beliefs, kids and in laws. It is good to know that you want to start off right with your fiancée’s sisters from the beginning. To begin with, find out more about what they like and let them know that you care. Respect traditions, especially those which any of your sister in law has been following for long. For example if your husband meets them for lunch or dinner every week, try to honor this if distance and schedules permit. You could also try to create a new one if you want to forge bonds with your sisters in law. You could choose to invite them once a month for a get together or plan family holidays. Also make sure that you don’t get in between your fiancée and his family in a bid to fix issues. You might end up creating a bigger mess. Most importantly don’t try too hard to impress your in laws in an attempt to save yourself from issues with sisters in law. You might end up raising expectations and if at any point you cannot fulfill them, you might find yourself in issues you had never anticipated.