How To Ditch Someone And Still Remain Friends

By Team BollywoodShaadis Last Updated: Nov 2, 2011 | 00:00:00 IST

Twenty years ago, it was nothing out of the ordinary for people to get married to someone they had never set eyes on before. Today, love marriages or at least love cum arranged marriages are the norm, rather than the exception.

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But in your search for the perfect prince or princess, you are bound to run into a few frogs. How do you let someone down without hurting their ego?

In this article, Team BollywoodShaadis.com has put together numerous scenarios that a bride to be in search of her Prince Charming might conceivably face, and how to handle them with grace and charm

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Have a look at them. May be you relate to these scenarios.

He initially comes to you with your parents’ stamp of approval, but when you meet him, you find that you don’t like him

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Say you meet a guy on a matrimonial website like shaadi.com or bharatmatrimony.com, or a friend of a friend of the family introduces you. You chat for a while (online or on the telephone), find that you have a good deal in common, your families like each other and so you make the decision to meet. But he turns out to be nothing like his picture. Or you find that you do not like him for some other reason. Now what? If you want to dump him, you have the following options:

Ask for his kundli, and then tell him that it does not match yours. Probably the simplest way to dump someone without any residual hard feelings. No harm, no foul.

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If you have already compared kundlis before meeting him, then you can’t use the above method, obviously. But you can still say no politely – if the guy is from Mumbai, then tell him that you want to settle down with someone from Delhi, or if he’s a M.Tech, then tell him that you want to marry a MBA. Or you can always try the tried and tested “religion” formula i.e. tell the guy that you belong to <>, and expect him to convert after marriage. Religion is a personal matter, so obviously no one would want to be told what to believe in this matter.

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A colleague/ friend at your college/ offices proposes marriage

I know it sounds rather disingenuous, but there are plenty of men who directly propose marriage if they meet someone they like. Turning down a colleague or friend is not easy, but if you are certain that you are not the right person, then you have a duty to share the truth with them.

At the end of the day, remember that the person whom you are dumping also has feelings, so do your best to treat him the way you would want to be treated if the situation were reversed. You may say that you want to be treated with honesty, but would you like it if someone told you that they were not interested in you because of your weight, or your complexion?

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Are there any guys out there with secrets to share? Or any ladies who want to share their wisdom?

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