How To Prepare For A Second Marriage

By Team BollywoodShaadis Last Updated: Aug 21, 2011 | 00:00:00 IST

Once upon a time, almost all Indian marriages were arranged, and lasted a lifetime.

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Those days are long gone. The divorce rate across metropolitan centres has quadrupled and even quintupled over the last 10 years. So if the unthinkable happens, and you find yourself getting divorced from the person you thought you would spend the rest of your life with, you need to come to terms with it and move on with your life.

Gaining closure after a divorce is not easy, but the process can be hastened if you decide to live life to the fullest by starting to party, laugh, date and love again!

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A divorce can have serious negative psychological effects on your mind, and in most cases it leaves the partners feeling completely disheartened and like a failure, at the end of the day it is just a relationship that didn’t work out. Do not let one failed relationship blight the rest of your life. If you want to learn how to move on after your divorce, just follow this advice and I guarantee you will be feeling upbeat about your situation in life in no time.

Do some soul searching

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Indian society being what it is, the majority of the blame for the divorce naturally tends to attach to the woman. Most women blame themselves for the failure of the marital relationship, blaming their inability to “adjust” post marriage for the divorce.

Time for some tough love: get over your sati savitri complex! It takes two to tango, and your ex spouse deserves his share of the blame. Or, since this is India, his family does. Try to think objectively about the situation, and clearly assign blame where it belongs. Once you have done so, put that chapter of your life behind you and move on.

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Do what you love

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A divorce can leave you feeling crushed and with no self esteem to speak of, but you need to be able to love yourself before you can expect someone else to love you. Do you love music? Or photography? Or salsa? Indulging in activities at which you once excelled will help you rebuild your lost esteem and will help you believe in yourself again.

Love the way you look

Looking good means feeling good. Maybe the stress of your divorce has added to your waistline, or shows on your skin. Make that woman looking back at you from the mirror as gorgeous as she used to be.

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Decide what you want

Before jumping headlong into a new relationship, figure out your needs and expectations. It is better to emphasise on security and companionship in a new relationship. Make sure that the guy is serious about his feelings for you and not just looking for a physical fling.

Be a social butterfly

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You won’t meet your soulmate by being an introvert. Get out of the house more often. Accept all invitations that come your way and increase your friend circle. Becoming active on social networking sites is yet another way of finding love in the 21st century.

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